This is a GREAT read ....!!!!!!!

Subject: FW: Seniors, they are a true example!!!!


Financial Services ProfessionalSubject: Senior's Moment
A 98 year old woman wrote this to her bank.
The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published
In the New York Times.


Dear Sir
I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to
pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three 'nanoseconds' must have
elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of
the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly
deposit of my entire salary, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in
place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief
window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of
penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.


My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me
to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally
attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am
confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity
which your bank has become. From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal
with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan payments will therefore
and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank by check,
addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you
must nominate. Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any
other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an application
Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete.
I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about
him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.
Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be
countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her
financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities must be
accompanied by documented proof. In due course, I will issue your employee
with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that
it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the
number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your
phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of
flattery. Let me level the playing field even further. When you call me,
press buttons as follows:


1-- To make an appointment to see me.
2-- To query a missing payment.
3-- To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
4-- To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
5-- To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
6-- To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
7-- To leave a message on my computer. (a password to access my computer is
required. A password will be communicated to you at a later date to the
Authorized Contact.)
8-- To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
9-- To make a general complaint or inquiry, the contact will then be put on
hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this
may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the
duration of the call. Regrettably, but again following your example, I must
also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new
arrangement. May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous,
New Year.


Your Humble Client




Remember: This was written by a 98 year old woman)




JUST GOTTA LOVE SENIORS!

Just one more shot

Ohio State got their ass kicked last Saturday .... MICHIGAN STATE LOST the game, Ohio State DID NOT WIN. They looked horrible ...
Old Coach .... "we got the momentum going right before the half, and kept it going"
Extraordinary ... they were even trying to figure out if there was not some way they could still win the national champsionship ... to me .... its a laugher.
A W is a W ... not doubt about that .. there should be a new catagory W (OSU) .. that would clarify the type of win .. either a STEAL ... LAST MINUTE .... OPPONENT LOST THE GAME ... something to clarify ....
I honestly hope they begin to realize that it is just a game ... the school, nor the players will live or die by the results ... I guess if I was making the kind of money coach is ... I would hype it up to. He is living in the past ... Woody is gone, there will never be another one ....
They just make to beg a deal out of the game ..... starting with coach ... someday, and it has already happened ... they will have the "fans" whipped up to a frenzy ... and something drastic will happen .... and then .... they will wonder .. "what happened" ...

I apologize ....

I apologize to all my OSU friends ... I was an OSU fan for many years ... and then, after Woody, and Earle, the program went to hell. I think money took over, coaches salaries went thrugh the roof, and the key word became ... MARKETING ... HYPE, DO OR DIE, IMPORTANT ... it's not, its just a game. And last night, IN MY OPINION, the loss to Penn State could not have happened to a more arrogant, conceited, over rated team, than the OSU Buckeyes .. I don't know where they hype starts ... Tressel or where, but every game so far has had NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP RAMIFICATIONS .... Texas .. "Maybe a repeat in the Rose Bowl." They were so sure about the Rose Bowl. They looked stunned last night .. "How could this happen?" "We are so great"

Go back and look at the pre-game comments ... Arrogance. I predicted 2-1 after their first three games. I predicted 3 to 4 losses during the season ... we'll see what happens. They were LUCKY to win a Championship, when they did. During that season, if 1 of 8 plays had happened differently ... NO CHAMPIONSHIP. They LUCKED OUT .. and, I think it's the worst thing that could have happened to them. They still replay that season on TV. IT IS JUST A GAME ....

Remember when Woody talked about his players ... he know about their scholastic achievements and was proud of them .. and "he's a heck of a good tackler" .. etc. Look at the money that old Joe Paterno has GIVEN back to the school .... for a LIBRARY .. a place for his players to STUDY.

MARKETING = MONEY = SUCCESS = MONEY = MARKETING ... I'll bet poor old Coach Tressel didn't sleep well last night. But, they had a good excuse for losing ... they had a week off prior to the game ... GOT STALE ... AND they couldn't land at the right airport and to ride on a bus, and, and, and, and. Simple truth, a good, hard fought game to me, the difference was focus .... Penn State wanted to win ... Ohio State thought they would win .... they were told so. They heard in on the radio, saw it on TV, and read it in the papers. Hey, that week off did it, you lose your timing, not as sharp, not our fault, that damn week off. Just ask coach, he'll tell you.

I am sorry, but, it could not have happened to a more ARROGANT bunch.